so long

this quarter life crisis thing is serious.

have you ever lay wide awake at 2 am just to drown in your own thoughts?

funny by the day you try to be the most positive person people have ever known, giving them countless encouragement for them to get by, preach about how manifesting good things for their life is a must. but then night comes and that person is tragically vanished into thin air, abducted by your own thoughts, your horrible, unforgiving thoughts that consumes your own sanity.

you always wonder, what’s it like to be emotionally stable? do you have to be financially stable to get there? or that's just the status quo, the way of life, that when you're not broke, you can enjoy your life. you live the successful life.

sometimes you’re also wondering about the-ones-that-got-away scenarios that you could’ve experience. how unfair it is to be robbed of the things you could’ve had. the word pain can not even accurately describe what you feel to begin with, because it’s just impossible to turn back time. so you just sit there, silently in the corner, staring into nothingness, waiting until the feeling of failure and regret would fade away into temporary oblivion, again.

you act all tough outside, but it’s just a façade of your self-destructive self inside. a façade of your sensitive side, your vulnerable side that you desperately want people to acknowledge without the fear of being judged.

as heart wrenching as it is, the bone-chilling night is your only comfort. where you shed your tears clandestinely. cause when the world is being showered by the warmth of the sunlight,

you’d put up a smile and whispers, "so long, sorrow," as your form of manifestation to get you through the day.